Healthy Lifestyle

To deal with stress you must ‘love’ yourself and recharge regularly

LIFE can be a series of stressful events.

Imagine having to work under a boss who breathes down your neck five days a week, or having to juggle between your role as a career woman and a mother.

Many of us have been caught in such situations, and crying “stress” is not uncommon. But what exactly is stress?

“Stress is a person’s perception of the level of stressor or threat in an event or situation and the person’s perception that they are not coping,” explained Ms Khoo Sue Anne, senior psychologist at the Institute of Mental Health (IMH). “These negative perceptions can lead to physical, emotional, mental and behavioural symptoms, hindering our ability to cope with the demands of daily life.”

According to Ms Khoo, patients at the IMH complain about stress arising from the workplace, home and social settings to varying degrees. And stressors usually come all at once.

Typically, the stressed person may experience symptoms like headaches, an upset stomach, rashes, insomnia and ulcers. They may also experience anxiety, depression or feel irritable.

“They may be more forgetful and experience a reduced ability to solve problems and perform their daily routines at work and at home,” said Ms Khoo. “Family and social relationships may be negatively affected with interpersonal conflicts arising from stress problems.

“In some cases, people may question the meaning of life and entertain suicidal thoughts,” she said.

People experiencing multiple stressors would feel overwhelmed. Experts have also identified certain personality types that are prone to stress.

“People who tend to be pessimistic and are afraid to reach out for help, who worry excessively and easily jump to negative conclusions and perfectionists with rigid rules of how they or others should live, are prone to stress,” she said.

For most people, talking about their stressful situations may help a little to relieve stress. Some may take it out on others to relieve their stress. But flaring up is not the best way to cope with stress.

The key, said Ms Khoo, is to maintain an optimistic outlook and a sense of humour when the going gets tough.

“It is easy to forget to ‘love’ ourselves and to regularly recharge our energies in today’s fast-paced society,” said Ms Khoo.

“We should learn to adopt a balanced lifestyle and not neglect the need to engage in exercise and physical activities, and self-soothing activities like having a massage or taking long or short holidays.

“It is also important to nurture our family and social relationships and to reveal our weaknesses to people we trust. Seeking spiritual support is also central to the well-being of most people.”

Having said that, it is advisable to seek professional help if you have been feeling stressed over prolonged periods of time or frequently find yourself unable to cope with stressful events.